The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More, and Change the Way You Lead Forever

The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More, and Change the Way You Lead Forever is a great book for anyone in a leadership or management role. I like that it keeps coaching simple and practical, not overly complicated. The main message of saying less and asking better questions is something many supervisors need to hear. I use this type of approach in basic management training because it helps leaders stop jumping straight to answers and start helping people think through problems. Easy to read, useful, and worth keeping as a leadership reference.

You should buy and read The Coaching Habit by Michael Bungay Stanier if you’re interested in improving your performance as a manager and your team’s performance and morale. If you’re reading this review of a book on coaching for managers, you probably fall into one of two camps. You might be a manager who’s already doing some coaching or you’re a manager who hasn’t made coaching part of your toolkit yet. You may already have made coaching part of the way you manage. If that’s true. you can skip over the next section of this review and get right to why this book will be an excellent addition to the other coaching books you own. It’s also possible because you’re interested in adding coaching to your manager’s toolkit and you’re seeking a good book to get you started. Then the next few paragraphs are for you. The benefits of coaching are pretty straightforward and well documented. A boss who coaches his or her team members effectively will have a more productive team, have higher team morale, and will have a more enjoyable work life. OK, so why aren’t you doing it already? My experience suggests that there are three possible reasons. You may think that the coaching that managers do and the coaching that sports coaches do is the same. Nope. Sports coaches do a lot of telling and don’t ask many questions. The art of the coaching manager is the art of the question. Or, you may think that the coaching that managers do and the coaching that professional executive coaches do is the same. Nope. Professional coaches are a godsend for us. But they’re professionals with a bag full of professional tools and expertise. Coaching with them is an event that you put on your calendar. The art of the coaching manager is coaching “in the workflow” several times a day. That’s why it should be a habit. Or, you may think that the coaching that managers do requires deep knowledge of psychology and coaching theory. Nope. The fact is that all the great supervisors I studied coached routinely without a bit of specialized training. Heck, my mother used to do it with me and my sister. They all asked something like: “Why do you think that happened?” or “What do you want to do?” and then listened. It was all about conversation and part of the normal flow of life and work. That’s what this book is about. Ask more. Say less. Simple enough that this preacher’s boy can get it. Here are the details. What’s in this book? Coaching is simple. So is this book. Coaching is lean. So is this book. The first chapter is about why you need the coaching habit. The second chapter is about creating the coaching habit. Yes, habit, something you do reflexively several times every work day. The advice in this chapter is based on real science, not that nonsense about “28 days.” The next seven chapters are about seven questions you can ask Just seven and that’s enough. There are “Master Classes” that help you ask the questions effectively. There are pointers to videos and podcasts and other helps. Still not sure? Well, there’s good news. Check out the “Look Inside the Book” feature for the Kindle version of this book. That will give you the “Why” you’ll need to judge if the book is for you Bottom Line: Five Stars If you’ve already read several books on coaching, this book and the advice on habit building will be a wonderful addition to your library. If you’re trying to figure out if coaching will help you and how to get started, this is the perfect book to buy, read, and use.

What makes this book powerful is its simplicity. The ideas feel achievable and practical. One of the biggest takeaways for me was this: be curious, and you will become useful.

I’ve owned "The Coaching Habit" for over a year now, and I can confidently say it has revolutionized my approach to leadership. Michael Bungay Stanier offers practical, actionable advice that has made a significant difference in my coaching style. The seven essential questions laid out in the book are game-changers—they not only encourage deeper conversations but also empower my team to think critically and independently. What I love most is the focus on simplicity and clarity. Stanier’s engaging writing style makes it easy to understand and implement the concepts, even for someone who may not consider themselves a natural coach. The emphasis on asking questions rather than providing answers has allowed me to foster a culture of growth and exploration within my team. In the past year, I’ve noticed a marked improvement in team dynamics and individual accountability. This book isn’t just a read; it’s a toolkit for lasting change. I highly recommend "The Coaching Habit" to anyone looking to enhance their leadership skills and create a more engaged and empowered team. Five stars all the way!

I bought and read this book 2 years ago and it hasn't left my side since. "The Coaching Habit" by Michael Bungay Stanier offers a refreshing perspective on leadership and coaching. Recommended by a colleague in the coaching field, this book provides valuable insights for professionals seeking to enhance their leadership skills. Stanier's approach centers on seven essential coaching questions, a seemingly straightforward concept that proves remarkably powerful in practice. The third question, "What's the real challenge here for you?" stands out as particularly impactful. It serves as a crucial reminder that surface issues often mask deeper challenges, encouraging coaches to delve beyond initial presentations. The book's principles demonstrate impressive versatility. I've coached senior executuves all over the world, appling Stanier's methods across diverse cultural and professional backgrounds. The results were consistently positive, yielding customized, impactful coaching conversations that transcended cultural and experiential differences. "The Coaching Habit" reinforces the fundamental importance of asking insightful questions and listening attentively to responses. It also provides the framework to pose more challenging, tactical questions such as, "If you say yes to this, what are you saying no to?" This approach often leads to significant breakthroughs in coaching sessions. The book's teachings are widely applicable, benefiting anyone in a leadership role or those who regularly interact with others in professional settings. Stanier's writing style, while professional, remains engaging and accessible. For both experienced coaches and those new to leadership roles, "The Coaching Habit" offers fresh perspectives that can significantly impact professional interactions and leadership effectiveness. It's a valuable resource for anyone looking to improve their coaching skills and, by extension, their professional relationships and outcomes.

Good insights and questions but the book is a bit redundant and full of spaces to answer questions and large text.

Easy read and very comprehensive. Having a personal experience managing, I really identified with a Lot of the author's insights.

I picked this up in anticipation of adding a coaching service to my editorial business. I dropped one star due to the fact that some of it felt a bit repetitive, although I believe this was intentional to drill the lesson home. This book is more geared toward managing subordinates or employees, but it still had a lot of great tips and advice in it for anyone who wants to coach, manage, or lead others. The biggest lesson here is to slow down on giving advice and instead ask prompting questions and listen as your coachee comes up with a solution on their own. While this may feel like the lazy way to coach, it actually does both of you a greater favor in teaching them to problem-solve on their own and be more effective in growing and achieving their desired results. Another part I found particularly fascinating was learning about the drama triangle, how we play all three roles at different times, and how to get out of it quicker.

Not worth buying. Absolutely no depth to this book. It repeats itself continuously in a different way.

I've had this book since late 2017 and I'm halfway through reading it. I only wish I'd read it much sooner! I bought it at a time when I had plans to start some kind of coaching programme for clients of my accounting firm, but with no formal coaching skills or training I didn't know where to start. As it turns out, I spent 2018 laying the foundations in my firm for all other services which would free up my time to get into coaching. Now, in 2019, I am venturing into coaching with clients and other accountants and this book is exactly what I needed to face my challenge, to build a structure around coaching sessions and to give my clients clarity on how coaching works and what can be achieved if they commit to the structure of the programme. An excellent, easy and practical read and suitable for anyone who wants to get into coaching themselves or others, or for managers looking to adopt a coaching habit with their team. Highly recommend! Michael breaks down 7 critical coaching questions that will revolutionise the way you engage with your peers and those you currently manage (but will soon be coaching!) It doesn’t just span your working life, but I’ve found it has helped in my personal life too; e.g., when a friend confides in me and is looking for help or a sounding board. The book is really quick to read. It’s concise enough that I didn’t find myself thinking, “yeah, yeah, I’ve got the reason why now get to how I improve in area x” yet it gave me enough that I felt I could go out and practice with it. One would have to be blind not to see the power in what is being said and in an era where there is enough momentum to confine ‘Command and control’ style leadership to the 80’s where it belongs, this book couldn’t be more timely.

A great book, however, I still think the GROW model is more relevant. This book was talking more about the conversation techniques - and also loved how he inserted Karpman Drama Triangle which could happen during coaching, yet the solution was missing in the book i.e. The Empowerment Dynamic (TED) by David Emerald.

Great book to read in leisure time

Non trovando l'edizione italiana ho acquistato quella in inglese, anche per esercitarmi. Lo trovo un testo molto utile, pratico e l'autore è molto divertente. Facile da leggere ed efficace.